my family reuniun

back in about '98, me and my buddy Lester went down to El Paso for my family reunion. Lester's a pretty cool guy, he supports all the ideas i do.

 thats lester

So anyways, besides being a true down home son of dixie, he had a REAL NICE truck back then. He had the party wagon from the TV versian of Kill Bill

  Party wagon indeed! Cept, he had a rebel flag covering his back windshield

So anyways, I really wanted to go to one of them whataburgers, an i hear they had some down there. So im thinkin "damn, i really want me some whataburger." After a while, Lester sees something and goes "Damn. That's a whataburger."

I look at the building, then back at him and i go. "Damn. That's a whataburger."

So we go in and i notice all the signs are in english AND mexican. At first, I just thought it was because everyone down here had to speak a little mexican to tell them aliens to "Get your ass right back over the border!" But when we get in line, we see it's a mexican takin our order.

So I look at Lester and say "This aint happinin in MY country!" So I shot the mexican. He started to crawl away, so i shot him again. 

Now we had a slight problem. You see, a cop had just walked in and had witnessed what we did. Even worse than that, Lester was on parole. 

You see, apparently when your on parole, you cant leave your town or carry a gun. Lester thought that was complete crap, so he rebelled lie a true southern hero.

Anyways, so i look at Lester and say "Let's get out of here." 

So we hop in his truck and we start to drive off, but i go "we cant leave yet!" and i throw a dip in. "All right, let's go." And we just gunned it. Sure enough, that cop tried to chase us down.

The laws of the the confederate (which i wrote) state that you have to have a small arsenal in your truck, along with enough copenhagen and budwiser to last three months. So i reach back for my twelve gauge, but lester goes "Nah, i got a better idea."

So we turn off and go down a back road, and we just gun it. Now it'd rained recently, so most all the dirt was mud. We went through it with ease, but i guess the cop hadn't ever been muddin before, and before long he was stuck.

Now when we realized this, we pulled over and threw a dip in and lester goes "Lets high-tail it back to Mississippi!" So we drove on back, and didn't have no more trouble with police